Friday, March 9, 2012


"Our greatest blessing was having you, knowing you, holding you, loving you. There are no footprints too small that cannot leave a big imprint on your heart."

March is Trisomy Awareness Month and I think it's important to not only educate ourselves on what a child born with a Trisomy title may experience, but also the struggles and difficulties that the parents and families will face as well. I would like to stress that all children are a blessing and all should be given a chance at life, and these babies are just as wonderful and precious as any other child. I never sat down and thought about what I would do if I ever lost a child or if had to teach my children about death at a young age, but when I was face to face with that situation I put one foot in front of the other and continue to take one day at a time. Thus far into my experience I can honestly say that these situations have made me stronger, made me step out of my comfort zone, and made me a more compassionate person. Overall I am a more beautiful being and I can relate to a whole new set of people, and I am forever grateful for that. Unfortunately when most mothers are told they have even a small chance of having a baby with a Trisomy title or some other diagnosis that may make their child different from "normal" children they are pressured into abortion or feel there are no other options for them. After all of the research I have done I have found many heart breaking stories of moms who chose that route and live with the guilt and shame and the forever torment of the "what ifs." On the other hand I have not found one single report of a mother who chose life for their precious child and ever regretted it, not one! All have agreed on one thing, that they embraced their child and enjoyed whatever time they were able to spend with their child and it has changed them all for the better. Before Ella I was against abortion, and now after hearing that the statistics are estimated as high as 80-95% of Trisomy babies are aborted I am furious, especially considering most of these are done under the "chance" of a defect. No tests can show which babies will make it to term, which will survive the first 24 hours and which will live for many years, but one thing is for sure, they should all be given a chance. Instead of living in the mindset that "these babies are going to die anyway, what difference does it make when" and keep in mind it is not over when the child dies. In fact, this is when the grief and mourning begin, there is no way to avoid these healthy, natural emotions. Many moms have also said that after they got the test results they experienced many days, weeks, and even months of anger, fear, regret, but these feelings changed over time and they are glad they didn't act on impulse or pressure. Over time their emotions were transformed from negativity and depression to a fierce love and admiration for their child. Because Trisomy 18 is so rare due to the abortion rates, there is little hope and little done to prolong life or even to encourage keeping these children alive even after birth. As a result those who are able to grace us with their presence are given a death sentence and very discriminated against. Above all I would like people to know that any mother who has had a child leave them too soon never regret meeting their child and would do it all over again just to have one minute with them again. Let's encourage each other to be stronger, better people and know it's going to be OK. Just put one foot in front of the other and take one day at a time, no matter what situation you are faced with because after all these are YOUR children, allow them to change your life and the world for the better!

1 comment:

  1. thanks, Maggie, I had no idea about the discrimination these babies experience. And thank you, sweet Ella, for opening my eyes.