Monday, December 12, 2011

grieving

Sometimes I wonder what is the best way to grieve? Is there a "best" way? Obviously I want to grieve in a "healthy" way, but I think if I can help others along the way that would be pretty good, right? When I decided to blog, I had told Drew about it and he wasn't super excited. Not even close. I would say annoyed would better describe it. I'm not sure he knew what I meant, but his words were "I don't want this to turn into a gossip fest." Haha. I just shrugged and left it at that. I have been reading a lot of blogs from people who have lost children, and other similar matters, and I have noticed one thing, mostly women are blogging through their pain. Over the last year I have learned one important thing. We, men and women, were created in God's image, but women were created for relationships. God, obviously, wants a relationship with each and every one of us, but women were given that trait. So I kept that in mind when I decided to follow through with my blog. Men and women grieve differently too. Drew has very few close friends, if any, and that's is 100% ok with him. I, on the other hand, love my friends and love to make new friends and love to spend time with them, getting to know them. Lately I have been reminded how amazing my friends are and just how important they are to me and my life as whole. Throughout this past month I have noticed a few people in my life, a few people that I see occasionally but never really knew much about. Since Ella, I have realized that there are a lot of moms out there who also "wear the shoes" of a mom who has lost a child, or who have lost a family member who was an infant. I am so grateful that God has put these women in my life before hand, because their comfort and support has meant the world to me! Today I met with a few friends from MOPS  and we spent a lot of time talking about my Ella and some others we know who have dealt with similar experiences. It was so great to be surrounded by people who I love and am comfortable enough with to cry and laugh and open up my deepest of deeps and be my most vulnerable. So I guess I have just answered my own question, the best way to grieve is to be surrounded by people who can grieve with you, just because they love you enough to share your pain. Thank you to all of you who have shared my tears!

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